Women often ask me, “Erin, I know I need to get out of my comfort zone to be successful, but how exactly do I do that and combat my fears around it?”
I have spent the past ten years overcoming my own shyness and lack of confidence by continuously getting out of my own comfort zone. Here are a few tips based on my own journey from shy to confident.
Your Vision Must Be Bigger Than Your Fears
When your vision is bigger than your fears, it will not matter if your fears are screaming at you, you will do what you need to get out of your comfort zone, no matter what.
Start small if needed.
There is no need to take big leaps when you are getting comfortable getting uncomfortable. I won’t stop you if you feel compelled though!
When you get into fear, think about your vision, who you want to help, HOW you want to help them and WHY. We tend to let our fears hold us back more when we are focused on ourselves, and not on how we can help others. Reminding yourself often of the bigger reason you are doing what you’re doing will help keep you focused on your vision and get out of your own way.
What Scares You?
Start by making a list of things that you don’t do because they scare you.
Meeting new people?
Striking up a conversation?
Making videos or doing FB live?
Creating your elevator speech?
Saying hi to a stranger?
WHY is this scary?
Is this a realistic fear?
Figure out what you are scared of then brainstorm what you could do to make it happen. Take baby steps.
For example, if your fear is networking, maybe you could take a friend to be your wing woman to introduce you to new people.
Small talk can be anxiety provoking for many people, so have some ice breaker questions to ask to avoid any awkward silences.
Do what Scares You
The fastest way to conquer your fears is by doing what scares you. Once you’ve broken through that fear, it will get easier, and your confidence will get a boost from having felt the fear and done it anyway.
Ask yourself the following questions to help you discover your fears and to breakthrough them:
What’s the worst thing that can happen if I…
What’s my fear?
What good might come if I did it anyway?
What could I miss if I didn’t do it?
Am I going to stay in my comfort zone where I won’t move towards my dreams, or am I going to stretch myself outside my comfort zone where I will gain confidence, take risks and move forward in life?
Remember, the more you stretch yourself outside your comfort zone, the easier it will get, and the larger your comfort zone will get. Before you know it, you will be doing things you never thought possible!
For daily confidence building inspiration, join me in my FREE Stand Up and Shine Confidence Challenge on Facebook! To join, go to www.erinsumm.com/confidencechallenge
Do you know two other women who would benefit from this challenge? Bring them along, too!